The Empress shuffled around in the darkness.  "What is going on?"

	There was a noise in the back of the cave, like someone had just kicked a
small rock.  Then, the same sound came a little closer.  The Empress yelled,
"Who's there?"

	In a few heartbeats, all the torches along the walls lit up.  Liu-Sing was
holding a terrified redheaded girl off the ground by the ankle; Miko was
holding the phoenix statue in the crook of her left arm.  Salon had not
moved from her sitting position; her arms were swept outward.  The Empress
was looking around, slightly confused.

	Liu-Sing smiled.  "Well well.  If it isn't that rice-picking girl's twin
bodyguard." (OLD VOICE: Saotome School of Anything Goes Final Attack:
Rice-picking Girl's Twin Bodyguard!)

	Salon folded her arms and stared up thoughtfully.  "It can't be.  I left
her with the harem.  That would mean this is... the rice-picking girl?"
Somehow, the thought seemed strange, even to her.

	Liu-Sing looked Miko up and down, perplexed.  "What is SHE doing inside the
palace?"  Miko looked like a fish out of water with no hope of going back in.

	Suddenly, Miko's arms blurred and a mound of thread assaulted the clown's
face.  He yelped and staggered back in surprise, dropping his captive
painfully on her shoulder.  Salon and Chun-Mae were stunned by her fighting
technique.

	While Liu-Sing struggled with his web-like bindings, Miko got to her feet
and bolted for the door.  Salon instantly pounced from sitting and landed in
front of the door on cat's feet.  "Tell me how you got inside the palace,
little one!"

	Miko backed up and looked around for another way out.  "I... I... I..."
She noticed that the Empress was sneaking up behind her, ready to grab her.
Miko stared Salon straight in the eyes and said, "It's none of your
business, Creep!" (NOTE: So she's starting to use one of Ranma's insults.)

	Salon looked slightly annoyed.  "You need to be taught respect, you
little...."  She threw her arms out to push Miko into Chun-Mae's grasp.
Miko ducked with more speed than the witchwoman anticipated, her arms
blurred (even from Salon's point of view), and Salon's and the Empress's
hands were bound together by a network of string.  Miko quickly slipped by
them and ran down the hall with the idol in hand.

	Liu-Sing had just finished pulling the thread from his face and started
after her.  Not two steps and he fell to the ground, tripped by a line of
string that had been tied to his ankes (her way of tying his shoelaces
together).  The clown looked up and smiled.  "Do you get the feeling that we
have missed something over the past few days."

		

	Miko ran into the main antechamber in a panic before she considered the
possibility that Lon was waiting for her.  She quickly glanced back at the
couch and stopped completely when she saw Lon sitting next to a familiar
fanged samurai--and he had the dark-robed man's pet crow on his shoulder.
Miko gaped in confusion.

	Lon, his head hung low, seemingly unaware of everything, groaned, "And so
Sayu and a dozen other kids decided to gang up on me with swords and flails.
They said a freak like me didn't deserve to live.  I had no choice but to
fight back."

	The samurai patted the robed giant on the back.  "I can see it from your
point, and you had the right to defend yourself."

	Miko shook her head slowly and continued down the opposite hall.

		

	"Ohhhh!  Uhhhn!  I must say... ahhh-hh... I've never been handled... Oof...
by a woman... ahhhh... with such ferocity!"

	All of the harem girls, thoroughly trained in giving pleasure and meeting
their Master's needs, were thoroughly stunned by the scene before them.
Regardless, they paid close attention to the new technique as a student to a
master.

	Ranma drove her elbow into the middle of the Emperor's bare back while
twisting his right arm sideways in a position human arms were not meant to
go.  She then pressed her forearm between his shoulderblades and twisted his
left arm over his head and out of socket.  Ranma's manhandling (no pun
intended) was greeted by a procession of pops that fell into place like
dominos.  She then took both his arms and twisted them again, and his back
crackled in response.  (NOTE: Ranma had learned a lot from watching Dr. Tofu
when Kasumi visited.)

	Miko burst through the doors and looked around frantically for her guardian
spirit.  She froze when she heard what soulded like a tree limb being
snapped in two followed by a masculine grunt, though whether it was a grunt
of pleasure or a grunt of agony, she could not tell,  She hesitated, then
turned in the direction of the noise to see a group of almost-naked girls
watching something.

	Ranma twisted the Emperor's leg in a 300 degree angle, did the same with
his head, then folded his torso over his back before she heard her own voice
calling: "Guardian Spirit!" !SNAP! Ranma twisted her victim's arm back to
his side--she hadn't meant to do that--and looked around in confusion. (She
couldn't have said anything without moving her mouth, could she?  Maybe she
just learned a new technique.)

	All the girls turned and gasped to behold a twin readheaded girl standing
by the pool.  Komiki was having blissful dreams where she stood.  Ranma
turned to Miko and took a step forward, pulling the Emperor off the table in
an inhuman heap.  "Hey!  Miko-chan!"  Ranma raised her arms to flag her
down, then noticed that she was still holding the Emperor's arm.  She eyed
him coldly, threw him to the floor, and headed in Miko's direction.

	Miko met Ranma halfway and gave her a big hug.  All the harem girls awed
them, some of them tearful of the beautiful reunion and some disappointed to
see that she was taken.

	Miko started pulling Ranma toward the door.  Ranma tried to resist, asking,
"Whaztha hurry?"

	Miko cried out, "You've got so save that stupid samurai warrior in the
other room!  He's talking to Lon and he's going to say something stupid and
get himself killed and I know I'm not good enough to save him!"

	Ranma moved away from Miko and staggered for the door.  "Okiy, Miko-chan.
I'll rescu im."

	Miko looked worried.  "Are you alright, Guardian Spirit?"

	Ranma staggered out the door, calling back, "Nver felt better." !Bonk!
"Dntworri, I'm okiy."

	Meanwhile, the other girls were checking to see if their Master was still
alive.  As soon as someone touched him, he sprang to his feet, untwisting
himself, as good as new.  He took in a deep breath and stretched his
muscles, sending a surge of pops racing through his entire body, then he was
fine.  "Oh!  That felt so invigorating!  I feel like a new man!"

	He strode over to the redheaded, pigtailed girl standing by the pool,
gently cupped her breasts from behind, and kissed her on the neck.  "I must
know your name."

	Miko's battle aura instantly flared up and she screamed.  She elbowed the
startled pervert in the stomach and left him in a pile of newly-made
laundry. (OLD VOICE: She definitely has to patent that move.)  The harem
girls gasped.

	The Emperor stuck his head out of the pile and yelled, "What's the meaning
of this!?"  His new anger burned off the rest of the sleeping potion in his
system and everything became clearer to him.  He stared coldly at Miko, his
own aura beginning to show.  "I know you!"

	Suddenly, there was a flash of light over the pool and the midnight-robed
man appeared, hovering.  He looked around and said, "I hope I am not too
early."  All the harem girls sceamed and scattered for a hiding place.

	Miko yelled, "Catch!" and tossed the statue at him.  He caught it and she
ran out of the room without a word.

	The dark man mused to himself, "Perhaps not."

	The Emperor growled and sent the cluster of clothes flying everywhere.
"How DARE you invade my home unannounced!" (CHEF'S NOTE: Yeah!  You should
tell me beforehand!)  He fumed and started glowing with fire, and the dark
man smiled.

	Then, to the dark man disappointment, the Emperor changed his mind and
started laughing.  His fiery aura grew brighter and he slowly started
levitating off the ground.  "I guess I should be grateful.  You have just
saved me the trouble of trying to find you!"

	The dark man shook his head in a typical here-we-go-again fashion.

		

	Liu-Sing, Chun-Mae, and Salon dashed through the corridor to the main
antechamber.  Salon's eyes suddenly grew wide and she yelled, "He's here!
Why now?"  The other two glanced at her as they ran, awaiting some kind of
mystical explaination.

	Instead, when they reached the main antechamber, Salon hastened down the
opposite corridor without a word.  The other two, on the other hand, stopped
in the middle of the room when they saw Lon talking to someone they'd never
seen before--he was definitely not a palace guard.

	The samurai clenched Lon's hand and asked, "And how did that make you feel?"

	Lon shook his head, still oblivious as to what was going on.  "I felt
lousy.  I had to hit something!  I had to make them pay!  I had to...."

	"Ah, excuse me, Lon."  Liu-Sing decided to be daring, and Chun-Mae opted to
stand behind him--literally.

	Lon looked up and saw an expression on his friend's face he rarely
saw--confusion.  The harlequin pointed rather meekly in his general
direction.  Lon looked to the side and his eyes narrowed.

	Reikiba closed his eyes lightly and nodded, "I know what you mean.  But you
can't let these things *Ack!*"  He felt a massive hand clamp around his
throat, and the next thing he knew, he was hovering above the ground,
staring into the giant's stealy, green eyes.  The crow on Reikiba's shoulder
suddenly woke up with a squawk and fell over backwards.

	Liu-Sing folowed Salon down the corridor, yelling back, "I have to see if
the Emperor needs my assistance!"

		

	Miko found her guardian spirit leaning against a wall with her eyes closed
and mouth drooling open.  To make matters worse, she heard footsteps coming
down the hall.  She shook Ranma furiously, crying, "What's wrong with you?
We have to get out of here!"

	Ranma blinked her eyes open, stood up straight, however shakily, and smiled
sleepily.  "Hiya Miko-chan.  Whatzup?"

	Miko tried to pull her guardian back the way they came, but Ranma
stubbornly refused to move.  "Whatza hurry?"

	Salon and Liu-Sing ran around the corner and into view.  Miko shrieked, and
luckily they halted, but only for a second, then they charged.  Miko
shrieked again, jumped forward, and sewed another giant blanket, which
threatened to wash over the clown and the witchwoman like a wave.

	Salon hit the fabric with a well-dispersed chestnut fist while Liu-Sing
grabbed for the edges and folds.  Together, they quickly fought the blanket
to the ground.  But when they looked around, the two redheaded girls were
gone--like they just vanished.  They both thought about searching, but then
they heard maniacal laughter coming from the room farther ahead (the
recreation room), so they swiftly continued their course.

		

	Ranma set Miko down before they reached the main antechamber.  Miko looked
forward and backwad, then scratched her head and asked, "How did you do that?"

	Ranma continued down the hall.  "I donno.  Whaddi do?"

	Miko looked back one more time to make sure they weren't being pursued,
then shrugged and followed her guardian.  They both peeked into the large
room to see what was happening.

		

	"How DARE you try to make a fool of me!"  Lon held Reikiba at am's length
with his other hand pulled back in a fist.

	"Why should I want to do that?"  The samurai had a hard, serious face.  "I
want to be able to help you, to be your friend...."

	The Empress was confused and startled at once.  She turned to the three
guards that happened to be walking by at the time.  "Do you want to take
that man to the dungeon?  How about you?"  She was asking, which she rarely
did, but she knew that if they didn't want to do it, then there was no
chance in hell that they would.  As expected, the three respectfully declined.

	Reikiba quickly swiped at Lon's face with his sword, but only took his
cloth mask off.  The giant dropped him and tried to cover his own face;
there was a crunching sound as the samurai's foot landed on the fallen black
bird.  The samurai held back one of Lon's arm and said, "You have got to
quit hiding yourself from your friends.  The only way you will start to be
accepted is by accepting yourself." (CUTE VOICE: Oh please.) (CHEF'S VOICE:
Who does he think he is?  Jerry Springer?)

	Lon put his hands down and faced the samurai.  "Do you really think so?"
Aside from Lon's disproportionate brow and facial scars, it appeared as
though most of his nose had been burned into his face and the left side of
his mouth had been sewn shut. (CHEF'S NOTE: Miko!)  He had a horrible cleft
lip and, for some reason or another, most of the sinews in his jaw were visible.

	The Empress and her guards took a step back.  Miko was definitely going to
be sick.  Reikiba nodded, keeping his serious expression.  Ranma walked over
to the samurai to see what was happening.

	"Hey.  Whazgoinon here, huh?"  She rested an elbow on the samurai for
support, but he didn't mind.  He was about to introduce himself and his
friend when Ranma turned to Lon and winced.  "Eew.  Didyu fall onyour face
alot or wereya just born that way?  Ever considr corrrective serjry?"

	The Empress and her band stiffined.  She looked around quickly then said
flatly, "Run."  In a split-second, they were gone.

	Reikiba slapped Ranma on the shoulder and scolded her with, "That wasn't a
very nice thing to say."

	"RRROOOOOAAAARRRR!!!!"  Lon raised his arms in the air, fist clenched
tight, and his battle aura glowed white hot.  Ranma and Reikiba stumbled
backwards; the crow popped up from the ground and started staggering to and fro.

	Reikiba yelled at Ranma, "Now look what you've done!"

	Lon roared, "BLASTING HOLE PUNCH!" and drove his fists into the floor.  The
whole floor cracked and exploded with the force of a block of C4.  Huge
chunks of marble and stone were thrown around the room and through walls,
most puching through the ceiling never to be seen again.  Miko had to duck
into the hallway to keep from beeing plastered against the wall by flying
debree, then she had to run out a second later before the entrance to the
corridor collapsed, then she had to run around to avoid falling pieces of
the ceiling.  Ranma and Reikiba were blurs as they tried to avoid
everything, but they were inevitably thrown against the back wall (about 50
feet away), leaving two man-sized dents.  The whole floor was now a crater
that reached five feet in the center, where Lon stood, and the walls were
creaking and barely holding up.

		

	Liu-Sing and Salon stood by the main doors, unsure of what to do, and
watched the two hovering forms circle each other over the pool.

	The Emperor, glowing hotly with fire, pointed at the dark-robed man and
said, "I have awaited this day for so long, ever since I heard of the legend
of your arival and the promise you bring.  I was certain from that point why
I had been given these talents I was born with, and I have honed them to
their fullest in preparation for this meeting--this duel.  I have also built
a small but adequate empire to give you a sample of what my mind can
achieve.  All that is left now is the formal challenge to prove my strength
and then I will be prepared for apprenticeship into your ranks."

	Salon looked a bit surprised, but Liu-Sing either didn't care or knew it
already.  The clown focused on the small, wooden statue in the dark
stranger's hand.

	The dark-robed man folded his arms defiantly and chuckled.  "Empires
eventually crumble and do not impress me, and arrogance is usually rewarded
with disappointment."

	The Emperor raised his eyebrows attentively, waiting for an answer.
Liu-Sing noticed that the Emperor was swinging around to his side of the
pool and he was glowing more brightly.  The clown quickly whispered
something in Salon's ear, then they hurried in a seperate direction.

	The dark man smiled and stated, "I have already been defeated in battle.
Earlier tonight, to be exact."  Liu-Sing shot him a glance of surprise while
Salon facefaulted.

	"WHAT?!"  The Emperor stopped and hovered in front of the door.  "How can
that be?!

	The dark man waved a hand in dismissal.  "Anyway, I would be reluctant to
take you even if you had managed to pass my test.  I have watched you over
the seasons and your powers, while impressive, have only served to make you
overconfident, and overconfidence breeds stagnation.  You are unteachable."

	"Do not underestimate me, Avatar!"  The Emperor's eyes now burned with
fire.  He outstretched his arms and his blazing aura molded into the shape
of a phoenix (a BLAZING phoenix, unlike the goofy bird).  The water in the
pool began to boil and the floor beneath him started turning black.  "I have
pressed my talent to it's limit and I have boosted my power with every
mystical item I could find!  I shall defeat you and prove what I can do!  I
have reserves the gods themselves would be envious of!  I am more powerful
than the great Saffron himself!"

	The dark man rolled his eyes.  "Do not flatter yourself."

	The Emperor roared and fired his entire phoenix aura at the dark man.  With
an explosion that seemed to have come from the next room (because it did),
the stream of fire plowed over him and left a huge five-yard hole in the
back wall, and the room behind it and the room behind it to the outside,
then it soared into the air and disappeared.  The dark man hovered in place,
unharmed by the attack, holding the phoenix statue in front of him.

		

	Miko slipped on the rubble from the doorway and tumbled toward the center
of the crater--toward Lon.  She landed on her back right in front of Lon's
feet, and she waved meekly when he turned his blood-colored eyes toward her.

	The giant looked down and only knew that it was a redheaded girl with
pigtails--that's all that mattered.  He raised his foot and slammed it to
the ground again.  Miko screamed and rolled to the side before her head
could be smashed into the rocks.  Lon stomped again and Miko narrowly
dodged.  The third stomp landed on her pigtail, making her cry out in pain.

	"Hey!  Leav're alone!"  Ranma jumped with all her protective might, letting
the bird that was pinned behind her fall to the ground, and aimed her feet
at the giant's ugly face.

	Still standing on her hair, Lon grabbed Miko by the arm and started to pull
her up.  Miko cried helplessly and grabbed the back of her head.  Lon was
forced to drop her as Ranma's foot drove into his nose.

	He staggered back, grabbed Ranma's ankle, and tossed her against a wall.
Ranma rolled into the crater and jumped to her feet, shaken but ready for
another attack.  The enraged giant picked up Miko by the waist and shoulder
and hurled her at Ranma.

	Ranma backflipped and caught her in the air, then tightened into a ball and
tumbled for several yards to work off the extra momentum, then landed on her
knees with Miko in her arms.  Miko was as pale as a ghost and tears were
straming down her face; for an instant, she stared into Ranma's eyes, which
were looking elsewhere, then buried herself into her guardian, whimpering
pitifully.

	Lon appeared to be trying to calm himself down.  He closed his eyes
tightly, trying to push out his frustrations.  At that moment, the main
doors blew inward and slammed into the back of the giant's head.  The noise
cause the ceiling to shake, and a large portion of stone and plaster fell on
Lon's head.  He blinked an eye open in slight annoyance.

	"By the gods!  What is going on here?"  Doshin stood in the doorway with
his foot extended, and Twilight was sitting by his side.  Their eyes widened
in joy.  "Miko!"

	"Daddy!"  Miko gasped and her face brightened.  Twilight lept forward,
bouncing off of Lon's head, knocking him down, and headed toward his friend.
Ranma gasped and fell backwards, Miko falling on top of her.  Miko looked
into her guardian's stricken face with worry.

	Twilight rushed to their sides and started licking both the girl's faces,
unsure at the moment as to which one was his master's daughter.  Miko
allowed a few quick laughs.  "Yes, Twilight, I'm happy to see you too.  But
we can't stay here."  She sat up and looked at her guardian again.  "Are you
alright, Guardian Spirit?  Guardian Spirit?"

	"Mrreeaaaooowwww."

	Lon pushed himself up from the rubble wishing he hadn't.

		

	The dark man pointed a hand at the newly-made exit and shot an icy wind
through it to cool it down.  He called out, "If any of you value your lives,
I would suggest leaving now!"

	At this, almost three dozen panicking harem girls ran through the hole.

	The dark man barely had time to put up a force shield before three arches
of air almost sliced through him.  He wheeled toward Salon, who was crouched
to his right with her staff her protectively in front of her.

	Just as the dark man raised his free hand to deliver a bolt of energy,
Liu-Sing jumped onto his back and threw a green cloak over his head,
releaved him of his statue, then jumped for the hole and broke into a run.
The dark man growled and flung an arc of energy at the fleeing clown, but
his aim was off and it slammed into the wall, just making the hole bigger.

	Salon threw another arc of wind, whch he deflected, then ran through the
hole as well.  The dark man turned to attack but was pommeled in the back by
a bolt of energy.  He fell to the side of the pool with an "Oof."

	"Ignore me, will you?  I'll teach you respect!"

	The dark man pushed himself up on his arms, clenched his teeth in anger,
then smiled as if everything were going as planned.  "Very well.  We shall
finish this fight."  He spun around and swiped his arm out, hurling a
thirty-foot-long arc of energy into the ceiling above, sending it crashing
down on the Emperor.

	The Emperor roared and the rubble on top of him melted like wax with a heat
so intense that anyone else in the room would have surely melted as well.
The whole palace began to shake.

	The dark man smiled.  "Temper, temper."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

	I apologize for the length.  I hadn't intended for it to be this long, but
I wasn't satisfied with the way the story was going, so I decided to get a
little crazy with it.  I hope it was worth it.